Love Begets Love...

...or so says the fortune I found in my pocket of a skirt that I wore on Monday.

I think it pretty much sums up everything that's happened since my last post.

I am going to back track to Friday. Friday I cried during 7th hour. This is earliest into a school year that I've ever cried. Not even during my first year teaching did I cry this early on in the year.

The cool thing is though, it wasn't the kids who got to me. In fact, I only have myself to blame.

You see we have a new head principal at our school this year and with that has come a lot of change. GOOD change. NECESSARY change. The kind of change that makes us want to be better. But with such high expectations and the change in and of it self, comes a lot of fear.

Friday I planned what I considered a pretty cool lesson. The first 45 minutes of class the kids were up, moving, arguing, using white boards, the smart board, the book. It was AWESOME.

The last 5 minutes however...

one kid wanted to show me the pictures he was taking for photography, another girl wanted practice her song for show choir audition, the other ones just wanted a second to sit there and breathe.

As a teacher, I strongly believe that these things are necessary. So that's what we were doing.

Then a principal walked in.

My heart sank. I felt like a kid who had just been caught with her hand in the cookie jar. I will be the first to admit that NOTHING academic was happening in that room.

He asked me a question about my objectives, I answered, the bell rang, and I marched straight to my department head's classroom and burst into tears.

She talked me off of my cliff. We talked about the importance of relationship building and how my kids are "different" and well frankly they are. I felt better.

Later God started talking too...

Fear does not beget love.
Worry does not beget love.


Fear only begets more fear.
Worry only begets more worry...and tears.

Noted. Thanks God!

On the same theme, different note:

I have a hugger.


Yikes!


What a hard position to be in. Bless his heart. His intentions are good. Believe me, I've had some whose weren't. He obviously has a deep emotional need. He'll raise his hand in the middle of a 5 minute spiel on points, lines, and planes just to tell me that he burned his arm making cookies last night. 


My prayer is that God will show me how to love each and every one of my students in a way that meets ALL their needs...and still feel comfortable. I pray that all the heartaches that they bring to school with them everyday may somehow be lightened by their interaction with me and each other. 


The mere act of committing those words to the screen makes me uneasy, but I truly believe God is going to  do great things with these kids. I have to believe...